I wrote up a brilliant post comparing the 2013 Red Sox to every character in Jonathan Swift’s Gulliver’s Travels. Then I lost my wifi connection and my laptop shit the bed and it was all gone, Pete Tong.

So now all you get is a Dick Pole card and “Go Red Sox.”

Rage on!

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Before the 2013 season started, I pegged Lacko to be the surprise of the year. I even figured him to win somewhere in the neighborhood of 20 games.

I’m still holding to that prediction.

And even though the only thing that I’ve had in my stomach for the past 24 hours is a full bottle of Jamesons Irish Whiskey and a couple of waffles, I am as serious as a mother f$%king heart attack.

The first step toward this lofty goal, of course, is beating the Twins today. And I don’t know of anything intelligent I can add here. Minnesota is 18-21 and settling into the basement of the AL Central. The Red Sox are winners of four straight and looking to recapture that April vibe. What we have here are two teams heading in opposite directions so all Lackey needs to do, I reckon, is pull the strings and hope that the natural order of baseball takes its course.

So, yes, I am drunk. But I believe in the 2013 Red Sox. I believe in five in a row. I believe that frozen waffles slathered in peanut butter with a vodka chaser is actually good for me.

And I believe in John Lackey.

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Okay, so May hasn’t been all that kind to us. But we still have the third best record in the American League. That has to count for something, right?

But, man, if we can’t lay waste to the 18-19 Twins during a three-game set, I may be viewing the rest of this month’s games from the detox clinic.

This is a sub-.500 team that we need to put a hurtin’ on. Never mind that it would earn us back a little bit of dignity after dropping three straight to them at Fenway; Minnesota is, quite simply, the sort of team we need to beat up on when our spirits–and wins–are getting low.

It’s practically a must-win for Buchholz tonight, because if the Twins slip past him, we have to rely on Dempster and Lackey to salvage the series. And I’m not sure I’m quite there yet. So, yes, Clay must win tonight.

But no pressure, Clay. No pressure.

The post We’re Number Three! appeared first on Surviving Grady.

“Just win. Just win.”

I ain’t looking for a 15-3 beat down. Just something positive to lift the team’s spirits and give them something to build on.

Not that I’d turn down a 15-3 beat down, mind you. But hungry men will take whatever they can get their mitts on. And I’m f$%king starving.

Lackey Power!

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The Boston Red Sox have started their season off with a bang. After just over a month of baseball, the Sox were sitting atop the AL East after a brilliant April. They sport the best record in the AL and in the majors, despite some calling this a rebuilding year for the Sox. If that’s the case, it’s been a hell of start to this “rebuilding process.”

The Red Sox were listed at 30/1 to win the World Series before the season started and are now listed 12/1 to win the championship. US sportsbook Bovada.lv also lists them at 6/1 to win the AL Pennant and +180 to win the AL East .

Of course, these future odds will change throughout the season as more games are played. We’ll take a look at these odds and determine based on the first month of the season if the Sox are worth a bet or not. Although our sample size is small, there is plenty to talk about after the first month of the season.

Rotation Bounce Back
So far, it appears last year’s poor season by Boston’s top two starters appears to be an aberration. Jon Lester and Clay Buchholz seem to be back to their old selves after posting a 4.82 and 4.56 in 2012, respectively.

This year, Lester has a 4-0 record in seven starts, has a 3.30 and an excellent 1.16 WHIP. However, Buchholz’s performance so far this season shatters those numbers. He has a 6-0 record in seven starts with an astounding 1.60 ERA. His WHIP is even more impressive at 1.02.

Can these two keep it up? Most likely, yes. Buchholz will obviously regress a fair bit, but last year’s poor performances were quite out of the ordinary. Both have been solid performers for a number of years, and many Sabermetric statistics indicated that both pitchers were a bit unlucky with balls hit into play in 2012.

The rest of the rotation has its question marks – but with these two leading the pack – Boston has an excellent chance of winning every few days. After one lousy year, they both have re-emerged, and it’s for real folks.

The Powerful Offense
It hasn’t been just pitching that is doing it for the Sox. Jacoby Ellsbury and Dustin Pedroia are two stars that everyone expected to put up solid numbers, and so far they are both doing their part. It is the supporting cast they have pushed this team over the top. Everyone who puts on a uniform seems to contribute, with prospect Jackie Bradley Jr. having a massive impact when he was in the bigs, to the clutch hitting of Daniel Nava.

Their offseason acquisitions have done the job, as well. The platoon of Mike Napoli and Mike Carp has paid dividends. Shane Victorino, who started slow and then dealt with an injury, seems to look like he is starting to feel at home at Fenway. Stephen Drew is even starting to swing the bat better while he plays excellent defense. Even at the ripe age of 37, David Ortiz is not only contributing but has been straight mashing the ball since he has come off the disabled list.

Well the lineup still has question marks, like the struggling but still young Will Middlebrooks, they have a heart of the order that are all tough outs.

Spend Less, Win More?
It’s hard to imagine a team shedding a hundred million plus in payroll and spending less but becoming better the next season, but that is exactly what is happening right now for the Red Sox. The million dollar question is: Can it continue?

We think so. It’s obvious to anyone that just because a player makes more money, it does not mean he is better than one who makes less. Other than Carl Crawford, the other players Boston gave up haven’t seemed to regain their superstar form. Adrian Gonzalez is hitting a crisp .343, but so far has not found the power he seemed to start losing in Boston. The platoon of Carp and Napoli has more than replaced his production, at a lesser cost. Josh Beckett has been terrible for the Dodgers, going 0-4 in six starts and posting a 5.24 ERA.

Still, we have to remember when wagering that this team did lose 93 games in 2012. They have a much smaller payroll and a roster that at least on paper seems worse than the one they had last year. Of course, they are outperforming that group now, but will that continue? Also, the AL East is a tough division, perhaps the toughest in baseball.

With all that said, we think this turnaround from last year is for real, and it is crazy not to label this team as a threat to win the World Series. The +180 to win the AL East is a terrific bet in our opinion, and even with the decrease in odds from Opening Day, a Red Sox World Series or AL Pennant bet pays out nicely. On a bet of $100, at 12/1 bettors would win $1,200 with a Red Sox Championship. If you think they have a chance to win it all, it may be better to bet them now before the price gets worse. Also consider increasing your edge by taking a free bet from the various US sportsbooks when you bet on your android for the first time.

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“Any wins in here? Anywhere?”

After Denton’s *ahem* uplifting assessment of the local nine in the preceding post, I would like to offer my own perspective on the 2013 team and what we’ve seen to date.

That perspective is as follows:

If I have to take an over-performing April and an under-performing May to get me to a somewhat-entertaining June, July and August that might lead to a pennant-chasing September, then I am fine with that. End of story.

I survived the Herm Winningham era, man. You wanna knock me down, bring your strongest stuff.

That said, anything Ryan Dempster and the bats might want to do to win today’s game and the Toronto series would be highly appreciated.

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First of all, I know you’re doing great things in your current role. With last night’s one-hit performance over the cursed Blue Jays you have further established yourself as the savior of that great and respected franchise, the Boston Red Sox. At a time when fans were gripped with concern, you righted the ship and basically told them to chill the f$%k out, because you were on the case.

That’s just the sort of thing we like, young Jon. Which is why we’d like you to consider a career with the Justice League of America.

I know the team needs you. That city needs you. But consider this: if you find enlightenment in being cheered on by 37,000 people every night, imagine earning praise from the entire world. And while I’m sure shutting down the likes of Jose Bautista and Colby Rasmus has its own unique rewards, consider, for a moment, saving the entire population of California from Lex Luthor’s heat ray. Or taking down Gorilla Grodd with an array of fastballs to the dome. Or using a cleated foot to kick Braniac so hard in the nuts that he loses consciousness along with his will to destroy reality.

These are just some of the things that an exciting career in the Justice League of America can offer you. Also, have you seen Wonder Woman’s star-spangled shorts? Have I mentioned you two would be sharing an office? Because you would.

Anyway. You’re doing some good work, Jon. In fact, I’d say you’re doing exceptional work. You’re making a difference and you’ve earned the respect of an entire city. We’re just offering you the chance to do good on a broader scale. We’re always looking for a few good men and women. And right now, we’re looking at you.

I know you wear your current uniform with pride. We’d like you to consider a different, but equally dignified uniform. One that could possibly include a cape or, at the very least, a giant “L” with lightning bolts across the chest.

Call us. We’ll be eagerly awaiting your response.

Sincerely,
Superman and the Justice League of America.

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Some facts:

So far this season, the Red Sox are 12-10 against teams with winning records. They are 7-0 against teams with losing records. And they are 2-1 against the A’s, who currently stand at an even .500.

What does this tell us? pretty much nothing. But if you consider their truest tests so far this season to be their games against the Rays, Yankees, Orioles and Rangers, they are 6-6 in those games.

Of course, the numbers don’t mean shit; if we listened to them, we all would have closed up shop after game 3 of the 2004 ALCS. All I know is that this team needs to stop the bleeding, and I can think of no better way than to send Jonny Lester out against the Jays at home on a gorgeous, beer-centric Friday night.

Ya feelin’ me? Ya with me?

Good. let’s rock.

The post We’re Not in April Anymore, Toto appeared first on Surviving Grady.

So this has what it’s come to. One week ago we were all swilling drinks on the Love Boat, sizing up potential World Series adversaries. Tonight, we’re praying to God that John Lackey–yes, that John Lackey–can keep us from losing our sixth of seven games and the whole bloody series to the Twins. Oh, and Joel Hanrahan may have pitched his last game for the Sox.

After last night’s shit show, which is really best left forgotten and will not even be honored on this site with its own post, things can only get better. Or can they?

We have fingers, toes and beers crossed that Lackster can step it up big time and turn things around before we slide any further down Crap Mountain. Which is an actual place. In Denmark.

The post And Starring John Lackey as the Guy Trying to Keep Us from Losing a Series to the Twins appeared first on Surviving Grady.

The other day, while watching the Sox cough one up to the Twinkies, I started wondering aloud if this team was heading for a June swoon in May. But then I realized that April was an absolute f#$king embarrassment of riches. If anything, the Sox over-performed throughout the first month of the season, and it couldn’t have come at a better time.

For one thing, it helped wash away the lingering taste of the 2012 season. For another, it gave this city a bit of uplifting when we needed it most.

And now May is here, taking over our living room like a drunk loutish uncle, waving around his 3-4 record and filling the place with cheap cigar smoke and making us all uncomfortable with that story about how he once tried to mate with a pigeon*. I’m not happy about it. But after what I saw in April, I’d be a true dink to complain about it. If I could cut Wes Chamberlain and Danny Darwin some slack back in the day, I can certainly give the 2013 edition some time to get their shit together and re-discover their winning ways.

If they wanna start tonight, hey–even better. With Allen Webster making his second start of the season, it should at least be interesting.

*Not based on any real-life uncle.

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