Underneath the harsh, alcohol-soaked exteriors, Denton and I are a couple of true romantics. We are also pretty fucking tight with a dime. Therefore, we are happy to present you with a set of Red Sox valentines that you can print, cut, send to the object of your affection, then sit in your cold apartment picking at a sandwich as the clock slowly counts off the seconds of your life. Just like we do.

And yes, most of these look a lot like the ones we offered last year. You don’t mess with a classic, baby.