When Big Papi smiles, the world is a better place. The sun seems brighter, the flowers smell better, your neighbor’s old lady looks a little less disgusting. But when David Ortiz is not happy, look out. Adults and children alike wake up screaming, the bravest man cringes and even Chuck Norris checks under his bed to make sure a pissed off Ortiz isn’t hiding there.

The big man took matters into his own paws this afternoon after watching Clay Buchholz pitch his last few innings for a while. I three-run shot in the 5th and a sac fly in the 7th helped the Red Sox claim their first victory in a very long time.

There are a lot of reasons I’m glad it was Atlanta that laid down for the Sox. For one thing, and this is big, they have worse crowd shenanigans than Fenway Park’s wave and even Sweet Caroline. That’s right, the chop. I’m about as far from politically correct as you can get without being in prison, and that thing bothers me.

Beating National League teams is always nice, only because of my irrational hatred for inter-league play. Oh, and I’ve had the unpleasant experience of spending a few days in Atlanta, and it sucks there.

Tomorrow we get Lester, and you better pray Ross is catching him. Then Lackey, then we don’t know who on Thursday before we get back to baseball the way God intended. I’m looking for more hijinks with the Rays this weekend. Yes, I used shenanigans and hijinks in the same post. Believe it.