This is the post in which I tell you that I’ve stopped tearing what’s left of my hair out over the 2011 Red Sox. Because they’re going to make the playoffs.
Yes, Tampa Bay is scrappy. Tenacious, even. Making things interesting as the guys on morning radio like to say. But they’re not taking our spot in the postseason. Not going to happen. Write that down.
The Sox fumbled through the first month of the season, then tore things up most of the summer. We started wondering if they’d win 356 games (a possibility if you use MLB’s “metric system” schedule). We sent pre-emptive floral baskets and meat trays to opposing teams, knowing the horrors they’d encounter in taking on our boys. We begged the Gods of Baseball to fast-foward us to the inevitable Sox-Phillies World Series.
Then September slapped us back to reality. But it isn’t going to bury our asses. We bounced back from one swoon and we’re gonna do it again. I’m not predicting that Carl Crawford’s gonna go “full Superman” anytime soon, but I do believe that a team as talented as ours can only play the role of the 90 pound weakling for so long.
Once we split this series with the Rays (yeah, you heard right), we’ve got ten games against the Orioles and Yankees, against whom we’re 19-7 this year. And I don’t see us folding the tents this go-round.
So put away the cyanide pills. Take out the Maalox IV. Leave the absinthe in the cupboard.
You’ll need all that stuff for the ALCS.