Never too cool to high-five a kid in the expensive seats.

It’s come to the point that even John Lackey starts — which I once approached with a two-gallon jug of Maalox and high-grade anti-depressants — don’t unsettle me. Because even when the Lackster struggles early on and gives up, say, four runs over the first three innings, I just know his teammates are gonna pick him up.

So when The Elf made that sweet play in the third to turn a bases-loaded, nobody out situation into a rally-crushing double play, I figured that was simply the cue for the offense to turn it on. And they did, plating six runs in the middle innings and rolling along to our twelfth win in thirteen games.

Simply put, this team is an ass-crushing monster. And it almost kills me that I wasted precious time back in April lamenting their pathetically slow start. Because these days there’s almost a sick fascination with guessing just how they’re going to embarrass the competition. Will it be with tight pitching or an unholy torrent of bats–or a combination of the two? They have the best record in the league and a two and a half game advantage over the Yanks and there’s really nothing I can say other than, “holy f#$k, yes!”

Of course, nothing derails a team like injuries, as we know all too well from last season. On Thursday, Buchholz (back) and Lowrie (shoulder) went down; last night, Crawford tweaked a hammy and Youk had a touch of the hangover blues flu.

But this team is a deep one, and with Lester looking for his tenth win tonight (game moved to 7:10 to accommodate the Bruins parade), I’d rather focus on the positive. Stay sober today, folks… don’t miss The Lester Show.