From the Globe via ESPN, a proposed three-way (very, very different from the sort of “three ways” Doug Mirabelli used to propose) between the Sox, Padres and Cubs ain’t happening. The deal — if one can believe it ever truly existed — would have sent Ellsbury and Buchholz to the Cubs, Andrew Cashner and Josh Vitters to San Diego, Adrian Gonzalez to Boston, and Joe Perry and Ric Ocasek to the band “Orleans.”

Meanwhile, Nick Carfado reports that Jeremy Hermida could blossom into a thumper–if the Sox are willing to invest the time to let him blossom. El Jeremito has never hit more than 18 home runs or driven in more than 63 runs, and Carfado argues that those numbers ain’t gonna get any better if he rides the pine as a fifth outfielder (if the Sox do indeed bring back Bay) for most of 2010. I don’t know if I buy the Ortiz comparison Nick attempts to draw, but he does quote an NL manager who says:

“To turn the corner, [Hermida]’s got to play. He could easily be a J.D. Drew type, maybe better, but if he’s platooning, not sure what that does for him or for the team. He’s reaching that critical age where he could just continue being what he is or he could become an All-Star player.’’

Look, the Sox need a bat. Everybody knows this. If Bay’s gone, it’s even more urgent. Someone in that outfield equation isn’t going to be here come April if that’s what it takes to bring a bat here. Pitching and Tenacious D will take you far, but you typically need at least one legitimate thumper in the line-up to get beyond the first round of the playoffs.

Have I been spoiled by the wonder twin powers of Manny and Ortiz? Hell yeah. And I loved every minute of it–especially the part where we won two World Series.