For the umpteenth straight game, Commander Kick Ass went tits up early, giving up two more home runs–a grand total of 14 dingers over his last five starts–and digging the team into a 5-1 hole by the close of the third inning. Has he lost it? Is he hurt? Is this some sort of not-so-silent protest against NBC’s recently-announced fall schedule? Whatever it is, I hope he cuts the shit and gets right; we’re gonna need his mangy ass if we want life in October.

Then, when it looked like we might piece together a respectable comeback in the eighth, with the potential go-ahead runs on second and third, A-Gon and Ellsbury struck out in situations where we absolutely needed them to come up with something–anything–to plate a run. Gonzalez I can understand; after all, we’ve been groomed to accept any offense he delivers as “gravy.” But, man, that Jacoby K was just a fugly, depressing thing. And I want more from the lead-off hitter when the heat is on.

Also, Teets, why not let Mikey Lowell get some hacks in? Surely he could have hit for A-Gon at this critical moment? Speaking of critical moments… enough with this Ramon Ramirez shit.

And can someone please knock Evan Longoria on his ass already?

What kills me is that the Rays wanted to give us the game. In fact, they did everything short of supply their fielders with hammocks and hot turkey sandwiches in the bottom of the eighth. They gave us three walks and a wild pitch, let us tie the game, then set the table for us to move ahead. And with only one out and runners at second and third, we couldn’t close the deal. Then, in the bottom of the inning, we gave it all away, big time.

F@#king disgusting.

So the Rays live to see another day, while we fall one game further behind the Yanks. And the Rangers are just 2.5 games away.

Anyway, here’s something that doesn’t suck: