See that video up there? I’m not posting it because I like this horsecrap music. I’m posting it as an all points bulletin to you, esteemed members of SG Nation. Today is the final day of voting for the 2009 All Star Game, which means it’s the last day to get Youkbacca and Pedroia the starting gigs they so richly deserve.

Still confused as to the right thing to do? Let’s look at the numbers. The Elf leads Ian Kinsler in the critical categories of batting average (.291 vs. .263), hits and OBP. Okay, Kinsler has almost 10 times as many home runs as Young Dustin, but let’s look at some other variables. First, which name’s gonna sound cooler rattling through the loud speakers when the starting line-up is announced: “Dustin” or “Ian”? Christ, this isn’t a cricket match, people; you’ve gotta swing with Dustin. Second, does Kinsler have one of these:


As I see it, you’ve got your own puppet, you’re in the f@#king All Star Game. End of story.

Moving on, Tex may have 6 more home runs than Youk, but the Bearded One holds a slight edge in batting average (.314 vs. .278), OBP and slugging percentage.

But more importantly, when it comes right down to it, which of these guys do you want representing your American League at first base:


It really isn’t any kind of choice at all, is it? Do the right thing, America. Vote Youkilis and Pedroia.