June 2009

My two favorite worlds, baseball and music, collided yet again this week when Joe Torre, AKA He Whom I Can Now Appreciate Since He’s No Longer Managing the Yankees, was a guest on Conan’s Tonight Show along with none other than Spinal Tap. Torre was there to rep the badassery that comes with managing the [...]

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Jonathan Papelbon didn’t just fall off the turnip truck. As our pals at Subway Squawkers and dozens of other outlets are reporting, the Bot knows the first salvo in any good contract negotiation with Red Sox management is dropping the Y word. From SIRIUS XM Radio’s MLB Home Plate channel: Jody McDonald (host): “If you [...]

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Yeah, I’m talking to you, weather. Screw your punk ass! This game is being played. You hear that? Throw us your best lightning and thunderclaps and black sheets of rain. Don’t matter to me. This game will proceed as planned and the Sox will have their way with the Florida Marlins and nothing that you [...]

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The Big Sox Machine keeps rolling, flattening all who dare cross its path. And just like Mongo in Blazing Saddles, when you shoot them, you only make them mad. Case in point: Brad Penny takes a wicked line-drive off the chest last night, but just shakes it off, like Superman carelessly waving away an intercontinental [...]

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Another one bites the dust. The New York Times and ESPN have reported that Sammy Sosa was one of the 104 MLB players to test positive in 2003 for PED’s. Sosa is only the second player to be named from the so-called “anonymous” results, A-Rod being the first. Is it only a matter of time [...]

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Anyone who thought that one month before the halfway point of the season Timmy Wakefield would be tied for the team league in wins, raise your hands. ::doesn’t raise hand:: So how do we honor this achievement, and celebrate one of the classiest guys ever to wear the uniform? Get his ass to the All-Star [...]

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Seeing the Sox set to take on the Marlins reminds me of those classic Sox-Marlins mash-ups of the late ’70s. Like the time Yaz showed up drunk for the Sox’ first-ever game at Pro Player Stadium and famously asked, “What the f@#k is a marlin, anyway?” Or when the legendary six-night, 54-inning game between the [...]

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Fact: I miss Jerry Remy. Fact: I just quoted the Jonas Brothers in the title of this post. Question: Do either of those facts make me gay? Not that there’s anything wrong with that… But I’ve found a solution. Back by popular demand is “Dial the Dawg” where Remy records a voicemail message for you. [...]

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“Charity work, mostly. And dodging Mirabelli, who I heard was in town and looking for some part-time work.” “Planting. Bigelow tea-sipping. Werewolf porn. In that order.” “Grooming.” “Finally categorized all my favorite luncheon meats by sodium content and ‘sponginess’. This is going to make life on the road much easier.” “Why? What did Jason say [...]

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