Cashman: Guess who’s coming to dinner? Can you say Mike Friggin’ Mussina?

Headwarmer: Well played, baldy.

Cashman: Our friends in Boston must be reeling from this. Looks like we’ve locked ourselves up a World Series trophy.


Cashman: Well, it’s done.

Headwarmer: Excellent. If I had hands, I’d be rubbing them together, doing a sort of menacing laugh.

Cashman: Indeed. Now that we’ve signed Jason Giambi, who can stop us?


Cashman: I’ve done it! I’ve landed Godzilla.

Headwarmer: Domo arigato! Let’s get shitfaced!

Cashman: Wait. I want to make some room for the 2003 World Series trophy first.


Cashman: Headwarmer, I hope you’re sitting down.

Headwarmer: Well, I’m on your head, f@#k-O, so I guess that qualifies.

We just got A-Rod. Freakin’ A-Rod will be in our house!

Headwarmer: I feel a Pabst- and happiness-induced blackout coming.

Cashman: I wonder if there’s some way they can just give us the World Series trophy now, so that we don’t actually have to waste time playing out the season…


Cashman: Just got off the phone with Carl Pavano. He’s accepted the crates of money. So, yeah, we’ve got him.

Headwarmer: Great.

Cashman: This… this is the one. I can feel it.

Headwarmer: ………………….. me too.


Cashman: Knock knock.

Headwarmer: Who’s there?

Cashman: Mister we just stole Johnny Flippin’ Damon from the Red Sox, that’s who.

Headwarmer: So, then, that would make this The Year, right?

Cashman: Uh. Exactly.


Cashman: Looks like Bobby will be here for another season. That’s gotta improve our chances.

Headwarmer: Chances of what?

Cashman: You know. Winning!

Headwarmer: Oh, that. Yes, I suppose.


Cashman: Headwarmer! What has two thumbs and just secured us the World Series title by signing CC Sabathia? ::points to himself:: This guy!

Headwarmer: Dude, I’m watching Oprah.