So Dunkin’ Donuts has this commercial with Jonathan Papelbon. And it shows him getting a long line of congratulatory ass-slaps after a game — a line that extends from the players to the fans, who line up eagerly at the Bot’s locker. Understandably, as you don’t want to risk any damage to the franchise’s buttocks, a stunt ass was used.

“We actually did use a body double for some of that,” Koval said. “We were joking that the commercials are based around all these butt slaps, and (Red Sox manager) Terry Francona would never approve of us slapping his butt as many times as we did.”

Honestly, the fact that there’s someone out there who got a call from an agent who said, “We need you to be Jonathan Papelbon’s ass,” is one of the greatest things I’ve heard in my life. Which tells you perhaps a bit too much about me.

Our good friend Derjue, an expert on the Papelbon posterior and possessor of a pretty nice ass herself, offered her take at Boston Magazine’s blog. If you’re more the moving pictures type, you can see the commercial, in all its ass-slapping glory, at Centerfield.