The Herald has a cool piece with some Sox players discussing what they plan to do during today’s meet-and-greet with the President, and their past experiences at the White House. Here’s the Cliffs Notes version:

J.D. Drew: “I want one of those all-access passes so I can roam around. I want to get into the Oval Office and get underneath his desk and see if I can find any hidden compartments like they did in that ‘National Treasure’ movie.”

Tim Wakefield: “[The President] knew who I was, which was really cool, and said, ‘Tim, great job, congratulations.’ [This time] I’d say, ‘Thanks for a great eight years.’ I’m a big fan of his.”

Coco Crisp: “I’m not going to say anything, but I’m excited. Maybe I can take a picture. I’ll listen to him talk, maybe laugh a little bit. He’s a funny guy.”

Josh Beckett: “We were the Marlins. I don’t think anyone knew we were in town,” said Beckett, who like every other player on the team had to get to Washington on his own because it was before spring training. “I remember it was a pain . . . because of security. I showed up at the White House with my luggage, and they didn’t really like me arriving with it.”

Kyle Snyder: “We went on a field trip in seventh grade, went to the Naval Academy, and I fell off a missile. We were doing a photograph and we were trying to get everyone in order, shortest to tallest, and because we were moving around I fell off and fell about 10 feet. My face landed on a railing. I got 20 stitches around my lip. I had to wear braces – at that age, it was a disaster – and they took me by ambulance to Walter Reed.”

Kyle Snyder fell off a missile? Might as well shut down the internet, folks. Nothing’s gonna top that.