Another bit for the Remy time vault last night as the Dawg officially pulled ESPN’s Bill Simmons out of the running for President of Red Sox Nation. Dirt Dogs has the transcript, the highlight of which — for me, anyway — is this exchange:
Remy: OK. That’s enough for one night but I’m telling you, some of this stuff is unbelievable. This Simmons goes right to the trash. The sports guy he calls himself. He wants free tickets. And he’s ripping my health. And he’s ripping Mike O’Malley of all people.
Orsillo: Yes. Obviously he has not seen you, because you’re in fantastic shape …
Remy: I don’t see him at the gym every morning. Plus I wouldn’t know him anyway if I saw him. So Simmons, your application has just been torn up and thrown in our official trash can here in the booth.
Orsillo: We have some ice cream; we have half a cookie… Who ate half this cookie? This is still a good cookie.
Remy: You know this in tongue in cheek, but this is for real. Don’t be writing in and saying you want to be president because I always wanted to be president of something. You want to be president of one of the greatest nations in the world, Red Sox Nation, you have to represent the people. He’s talking about getting free tickets. He’s ripping Mike O’Malley. He’s ripping my health. I mean, c’mon. The sports guy. There’s a lot of sports guys out there, right? Your campaign is officially over. Now he’ll rip… what does he write for again?
Orsillo: I think ESPN.
Brilliant. Of course, no matter how this crazy-ass voting shakes down, we all know who the real president of RSN is.
Tonight, it’s more fun with the Royals. Anything less than three wins in this series and I swear, I might just take the name of Dana Kiecker in vain.