No, I am dead serious. Enough with the freakin’ Braves. I don’t care that a half a million years ago they were the Boston Braves, bringing the Sox and Atlanta together during interleague play is an idea that has become more mind-numbingly lame to me than the concept of interleague play itself. Somewhere in the bowels of MLB, Inc, is a guy who sits down every winter and says, “Oh, man, Sox and Braves… ya gotta have that!” And the motherf–ker slaps it in the calendar and seals our collective fate. I want that guy. I want him cast to the eels or handcuffed to Rip Taylor or added to the writing staff of According to Jim. Something painful, like being subjected to Chipper Jones’ greasy mug for a couple hours, as I’ll be tonight.
You’ve really f–ked it up again, “that guy.” This is the last f–king year I want to have anything to do with the Braves. Capeesh?