Put down that croissant and go to the Phillies’ website. Check out the commercials they’ve created for the 2007 season. Specifically, “Locker Room” and “Doctor.” Funny stuff.

This is the sort of thing the Sox need. Come on, we’ve got David Ortiz, Mike Timlin, Matt Clement, Terry Francona and Hazel Mae. That’s practically an episode of The Office waiting to happen. Or at the very least an impossibly disturbing softcore porn flick. Sure, there’s not a single centimeter of ass space to sell in the entire park from April through to October, but why not promotion just for promotion’s sake? Or just so we can dig on some 30 second spots featuring Mike Lowell in a stovepipe hat and apron, a shirtless Kevin Youkilis wrestling a guy in a bear suit, or Curt Leskanic discussing the importance of self-administered testicle exams. Yes, I know Leskanic’s a few years gone, but work with me here. We could have something.

We’ve already got those awesome player billboards all around the Park. Howzabout some commercials as well?