Steinbrenner: OK, you all know why we’re here. What the f-ck just happened?
Torre: Pitchers didn’t pitch, hitters didn’t hit, simple as that.
Steinbrenner: It’s your job to make them pitch and hit, Charlie!
Brian Cashman: If I can just bring us to the point. Do we need a new manager? I can have Showalter here in a week.
Steinbrenner: Didn’t we try that already? Plus, the guy looks like Wrongo Star from F-Troop. Now F-Troop, that was a funny show. Did you guys see…
Brian Cashman: OK, Boss, Showalter’s out. What about Pinella?
Steinbrenner: How about no more retreads?
Torre: You guys do realize I’m still sitting here?
Trump: George, I think you know what needs to be done. I love Jeter, why isn’t he here?
Steinbrenner: He’s busy filming a Nair for Men commercial. That guy’s bottom is as smooth as a baby’s.
Trump: Ain’t it the truth.
Torre: That’s it, I’m out. ::jumps up and heads for the door::
Brian Cashman: Hey Boss, why don’t you manage the team yourself?
Steinbrenner: Screw that Cashman. They play like a hundred games a year, I don’t have time for that. Besides, baseball pants give me some pretty unsightly bulges.
::The air suddenly gets cold and a holographic image appears in Torre’s vacant seat::
Ghost of Billy Martin: When do I start? Sixth time’s a charm!