One of the problems with being a Red Sox fan in the early 21st century was Pedro Martinez. While the guy was most certainly nails, he was also a relentless intimidator, and with his less-than-imposing frame, I’d always panic about someone charging the mound. What would happen if some cantankerous batter felt they’d endured one Petey brushback too many? What if said batter charged the mound? Would Pedro turn to dust immediately on contact?

These fears were realized during a game against the D-Rays, where Pedro plunked reputed “thug” [to use Dan Duquette's words] Gerald Williams. In one of the most surreal “pre-fight” sequences in MLB history, Williams, as if he’d already played everything out in his mind, took a few steps, then glanced at the mound, then his hand, then waited a beat for maximum effect, then charged our li’l Dominican. As expected, Pedro looked somewhat like an old Mego Spider-Man figure caught in a blender once Williams arrived at his doorstep. But, hey, that’s what teammates are for.

Why do I bring this up now, especially when I’ve already beaten the subject of basebrawls to death [pun intended]? Because someone just sent me this link to a Sports Center video of the top baseball fights, which includes not only the Pedro-Williams mash-up, but other gems like Izzy Alcantara goin’ all Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon on a triple-A catcher and Nolan Ryan’s spotlight dance with Robin Ventura. Actually, the Sox are well-represented here, as the clip also includes the car wreck that was Mo Vaughn slamming into George Bell after GB was plunked by Aaron Sele.

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Today’s Globe reports that the Sox are working on signing Bronson Arroyo to a multi-year contract. The same article indicates, however, that they’re still not close to moving David Wells. I know Boomer wants to leave. But last year, he was our most reliable starter [which is a scary enough thought in and of itself]. He’s also one of the game’s premier “characters,” and outside of that mid-July stretch where he went absolutely batshit — screaming and bumping some umpires, earning a lengthy suspension, then pretty much threatening Bud Selig during a press conference — we really didn’t get the sort of lunacy I’d been hoping for. I think one more season in town and we’ll finally get the “found pantsless at Daisy Buchanan’s” stories we’d been dreaming of since his signing.

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In other news, this silly-ass site has been nominated as one of the “Best of Blogs.” We’re not sure what any of this means, but if you’re the voting type, please head on over and check off our name. Anything to keep Denton in cheap wine and hookers.