Dear God:

I don’t ask for much. Okay, sure, there was that thing with The Pussycat Dolls and forty metric tons of Bisquick. But on the whole… not a lot.

So I must pose the question: Why do you take such delight in tormenting me?

I mean, this week is already the single most important week of the 2005 Red Sox season. The week that will more or less define my mental and physical well-being for the next half-year. And you pick the day of the first game of this particular week to kick it Noah style? Not cool.

Now, you’ve not only erased any dreams I harbored of watching Schilling and the Big Handsome go at it a la Godzilla and Rodan, you’ve also set me up for what will surely be an excruciating Tuesday. A pair of games to be played — one during normal business hours, for feck’s sake — which can mean double the ecstasy or two times the agony. Christ almighty, when I think of how creative Tito might get with the line-up for that second game…

I notice you also allowed the Yankees game to be played, and it seems they left Baltimore’s pants around their ankles yet again. You might think this will break me, but it won’t. It’ll only make me stronger. More defiant. More convinced that our boys can pull off two wins in one day.

That said, according to the Yankees, as Chris Snow informs in today’s Globe, our season may already be done:

The Yankees, in a letter issued on or before Sept. 19, notified suite holders of 2005 postseason ticket information. The memo’s opening line?

“The New York Yankees are entering the post season for the eleventh consecutive year.”

Feh. I think I’ll tune in today anyway.

Also, thanks to Joshua Glenn for the interview in the most recent Boston Sunday Globe.